How To Eat Like A Woman?

Welcome goddess! 

Thank you so much for tuning into this training! 

I have a strong feeling that what you learn today will both surprise and intrigue you at the same time. That’s ok! 

Today’s training is a free coaching session that is designed to get you to reclaim your relationship with your female body, your menstrual cycle, and food. 

However, in order for you to get the most out of this training, here’s what I need you to do – promise me that you will stick with this until the very end! 

We live in a world of constant distractions which make it extremely difficult to focus and absorb something valuable. 

I am aware of that. 

So, If you are anything like me, then you have a very short attention span and it’s hard for you to stay focused for a long period of time.

So before we begin our coaching session, let’s have an agreement. (Imagine yourself signing a contract with me 😉 

On this training, I am going to deliver a kicker content that will change the way you have been thinking about yourself as a woman, wife, and mother. 

In order for this to happen, I need your attention and focus, however, I am not going to ask you to sit or allocate time in your busy day just for this. I am a busy mama just like you, so I get it. 

You can absolutely listen to this training while you are doing your daily activities – folding the laundry, washing the dishes, cleaning the house, driving, grocery shopping, etc. 

But the best way to consume this content, however, is to grab a nice cup of coffee or tea, sit with your journal and do the exercises I will walk you through. 

So stick till the end and allow this new information to simmer and unfold for you the way it needs to.  

This training is designed for women, wives, and mothers who want more out of their lives, who know there is more available for them and just need help to figure out how to get access to it. 

In the context of today’s training, we are going to talk about your body and how to feed it in a way that is aligned with your design as a female. 

Before we dive deeper, let me tell you a bit about who I am and why I do this work. 

Who am I? 

My name is Dorit Palvanov, a wife and mom of three daughters. I am a registered holistic nutritionist, and a health & embodiment coach for women. 

I have always wanted to be a mother. 

Once I got married, getting pregnant became goal number one. I craved to hold a baby in my arms, fantasized about nursing a baby, looking after and caring for her. I’ve pictured myself reading to my baby every night, guiding her through difficult feelings, patiently explaining why she can’t have what she wants and giving everything I’ve got to raise a really “good” human being. 

All I wanted was to be a ‘good mom’.

And then it happened. After about six months of trying, we finally got pregnant, and our first daughter was born in July of 2009. 

This experience was the best and worst of my life all at the same time. 

On the one side I was so blessed to hold a cute and healthy baby in my arms, on the other, there was so much suffering/grief/maturing/growth wrapped around this new life leaving me scared and confused from within. 

This was just the beginning…

A year and a half after my first daughter was born I’ve had another baby, and four years later another. Both girls. 

Here I was, a young, confused and scared mama of three daughters. 

I was blessed with three beautiful and healthy girls but all I could think about was how incompetent and out of control I felt in my own life.

Whenever I looked into their huge almond-shaped eyes I’ve seen their potential and future and wished to be able to guide them to become more of who they are. 

As a mom, I wanted to give them the tools, advice, experiences, mindset, habits, and behaviors so they can grow to become fierce, bold, confident, courageous, successful, self-reliant, strong, emotionally resilient, and healthy women.  

All of this while feeling like I don’t even know who I was. 

How do you give something you yourself don’t have?

This was my opportunity to look within and finally find myself, so that I can become the mother my daughters deserved. 

My history & healing journey  

You see, I am a daughter of a mother who, like me, had three girls. 

My maternal lineage is full of women. Women who were amazing mothers, wives, and caretakers, but struggled to live authentically and take care of themselves. I couldn’t ignore the pattern that living unauthentically lead to some debilitating pain, physical symptoms, emotional pain, mental dis-eases and even spiritual disconnection to the divine and themselves. 

I’ve witnessed this pain first hand in: 

  • My mom who’ve suffered from depression by the young age of forty and had to be medicated for years after. 
  • My maternal grandmother’s struggle with a high blood pressure and diabetes which led to a brain stroke and eventually to painful dementia and a slow, heartbreaking passing. 
  • My paternal grandmother who’s gallbladder was removed at the young age of 45, who then suffered with weight gain, anxiety, panic attacks, heart problems, diabetes, and chronic iron deficiency. 
  • My beloved aunts who suffered from breast cancer, ovarian cancer, fibroids, depression, thyroid diseases, weight gain, mental problems, and other women’s health problems. 

Sadly, vibrancy, robust health, aliveness, and joy were very rare in my lineage and I was headed in the same direction (along with my three daughters).

By age 30, my body started to manifest extreme fatigue, burnout, anxiety, panic attacks, hormonal imbalances, brain fog, low back pain, mid spine pain, hip pain, carpal tunnel syndrome, sciatic pain, blurry vision, adult acne, hair loss and heavy periods with blood clots. 

Emotionally and mentally I was depressed, unhappy, negative and miserable. The daily challenges of motherhood consumed me with victimhood and feeling sorry for myself. 

What was going on?

Up until I became a mom I was a happy, energetic and positive woman. 

People used to say that the room lits up when I come in, that it was difficult to not notice me. Before we got married, my husband used to call me an “energizer bunny” because of all the energy I had. 

Where did all of that go?

Who was I? I didn’t recognize myself. 

With pregnancy and labour something major happened to me and I felt like I am losing myself. 

This is NOT how I envisioned this stage of my life to be. 

What’s worst, all of this had a direct effect on my most sacred work at home as a wife and mother as well as with my life’s work. 

The debilitating aches and pains prevented me from showing up for my family. 
My career was shoved to the back burner because I felt overwhelmed by running a business while raising small kids. 

I wasn’t happy. Nothing was good enough. 
I wanted to control everything. 
I yelled. A LOT. 
My husband and kids didn’t enjoy my company (let’s put it this way).
I wasn’t a nice mommy. 
I was an angry, bitter, raging wife and mom struggling with a severe identity crisis. 

In search for help, I looked at my mom and tried to learn from her how she’d coped with challenges in her life and realized that she, just like me, has been confused and disembodied for the majority of her adult life. 

There was something missing deep within her. I realized that she is deeply driven by a fear of her own true power. For her, this manifested in people pleasing, deep self-sacrifice, obsessive pursuit of perfection, the constant questioning of herself, and profound self-neglect that led to various dis-eases and hormonal imbalances. 

She was always looking outside of herself for confirmation of her worth and value. In other words, she was always looking for someone else to take care of her. Never realizing her own power and ability to take care of herself. 

That scared the shit out of me. 

I didn’t want to be like that. 

Heck, I didn’t want my girls to be like that. 

The more mature I got, the more I started noticing this all around me. Older and wiser women were struggling with fear, indecision, self-doubt, control, self-sabotage, boundaries, stating their needs, emotional immaturity, playing small – all of which manifested as physical symptoms, such as painful periods, PMS, PCOS, chronic fatigue, thyroid diseases, weight gain, high blood pressure, weak immune system, and in severe cases even breast and ovarian cancer.  

Sick, unhealthy and burnt out women were all around me, and around my daughters.

Women, who didn’t understand their female body. 
Women who’ve felt like being a woman was a curse, not a blessing. 
Women, who’ve self-neglected themselves physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually for decades (if not centuries). 

I knew that if I didn’t change, this would be passed on to my girls. 

I knew how to take care of others, but the scary truth was that I didn’t know how to take care of myself. 

Years of personal development growth led me to confront the truth that I wasn’t living in full integrity with myself. I wasn’t being true to myself. I wasn’t using my human potential. 

I couldn’t live with this truth knowing that I am raising daughters. 

The saying “the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree” was haunting me and I knew I had to take action and learn how to take care of myself so that I can show my girls how it’s done. 

Parenting is personal growth on steroids. There’s no time to play small, time is ticking and your kids are watching you. 

My girls were watching too. 

My ‘eat-pray-love’ moment

Like Elizabeth Gilbert, I found myself on the bathroom floor sobbing and wailing in pain and agony. 

On the physical level, I started saying things like: 
“I hate my fat arms”
“I hate my huge butt”
“I hate my enormous scarred belly”
“I hate what these pregnancies have done to me!”
“Motherhood destroyed me”
“ I want my pre-baby body back”
“I hate feeling like a stuffed-up sausage”  
“I don’t have any energy or life force in my body left for me!”

On a deeper, emotional level I started keeping myself busy just to survive, to get through another uninspiring day. The chatter, the noise in my head and the unbearable sense of overwhelm, fatigue, low libido, low energy, lack of joy and deep sadness were all soothed by doing mundane and uninspiring things like cleaning the house, laundry, cooking healthy and elaborate meals for my family, and worst of all isolating myself from everyone and everything. 

What was I doing wrong? 
Why wasn’t I feeling joy?
Why was I suffering so much?
Why was I so harsh with myself?
Why did I have such a negative and mean self talk?
And the harshest question of all – how do I change this? Where do I start?

Long story short, this experience had led me on a deep inner quest.

A quest to find my true authentic, radiant, alive and joyful self. She was there, I just didn’t know how to access her. 

I knew I couldn’t do this on my own, so I reached out for help. 

I’ve read personal development books, listened to podcasts, attended workshops and seminars locally, started practicing yoga consistently, changed my eating style, stopped dieting, quit following dogma (there is a lot of dogma in the health industry), and became committed to change. 
I even completed my training as a registered holistic nutritionist at the CSNN in May 2012. 

The problem was that I knew ‘everything’ but didn’t have enough motivation and/or discipline to follow through and stick with something for more than a week. 

The highlight was accepting that in order to see results fast I had to invest in myself and work with a coach. Otherwise, it would take me a long time to achieve what I want. 

Time was (and still is) a scarce resource that I was not willing to waste any longer. 

So I hired a coach. 

That wasn’t an easy step to take as at the time I wasn’t making any money. 

I felt like all I do was take money away from my family but never really doing anything with what I learn. My husband was reluctant to pay for this coaching because at this point I have completely severed his trust. 

It was that bad. 

I wanted something but didn’t really know what I want. 
My soul was restless. 

Looking back, hiring that coach was the best thing I’ve done for myself AND for my family. 

For the first time in my life I’ve had someone who cared about me and wanted me to succeed. For the first time I’ve had someone to talk to about my feelings, fears, struggles and challenges. Most importantly, for the first time in my life there was someone who could show me the way and lead me to the other side. 

I followed her advice and coaching diligently and was so happy with the results. 

Coaching was extremely helpful since I didn’t know what I didn’t know. My coach helped me to interrupt the unconscious patterns of behavior I would never be able to do this myself. 

Also, coaching helped me to really focus and hone in this one area of my life that needed love and attention – what you focus on grows. 

Through coaching, I have learned to be in a constant state of inquiry and ask myself questions to keep myself from stagnation.  

Once I have given myself the permission to answer some hard questions the truth started to rise to the surface. 

I have been able to find who I am, identify my core desired feelings, what I truly desire and how I want my life to turn out to be. 

Through this process I was finally able to say out loud that I am a healer, without feeling shame about it. 

I am an intuitive empath and I love helping mothers thrive in their life and mothering journey. 

Staying true to myself and learning how to take care of myself had changed my life dramatically. The change occurred mentally, emotionally as well as physically as I was able to balance my hormones, shed the unnecessary weight I was carrying around hiding my true essence, learn how to eat and move my body like a woman, and have the courage to face and heal my wounds one at a time. 

I am excited to pass on this information and education to my daughters who have seen me struggle and rise through it all. 

My journey is still unfolding and I will be forever learning. 

Healing the feminine pain is my healing journey and I’m honoured to share it with you. 

My mission 

My current work is dedicated to healing the legacy of suffering and health conditions in women that arise as a result of not taking care of ourselves, especially when we’re moms. 

I’ve learned that these behaviors are generational patterns that travel across generations and keep reappearing until someone breaks this destructive chain. 

This person could be you. 

It has to be you! 

Motherhood is your sacred portal for healing and personal growth. 
A more alive, strong, fun, joyful, connected, calm, peaceful, aligned and embodied you is right around the corner. 

My approach to healing is different than what you might’ve seen “out there”.

I don’t believe in dogma. 
I don’t believe in rigidity. 
I don’t believe in dieting. 
I don’t believe in ‘starving yourself to skinny’
I don’t believe in “losing the weight just to fit into that black dress”
I don’t believe there’s only one way to heal and I refuse to believe that stress, exhaustion and burnout is “normal” for mothers. 

God wouldn’t do this to us. 

I believe we CAN be happy, joyful and healthy as moms. This is our birthright and responsibility to pass along to our daughters.  

I believe women need to be heard, not just seen. 
I believe we have to stop rushing.
I believe we have to know how to eat like a woman.  
I believe we have to start trusting the wisdom of our bodies. 
I believe in intuitive eating. 
I believe in cyclical living.
I believe we have to start understanding how we’re designed as females and organize our lives in alignment with that. Not the other way around. 
I believe women must move their hips daily.
I believe in asking for help. 

I believe in deep healing, not just scratching the surface. 

I believe that motherhood is a divine order. 
I believe that mothering, nurturing and caretaking is beautiful ONLY when you give to yourself the same things you give to your children. 

Raising children while depleting yourself is not cool, or healthy. 

The health of the world begins at home, with you the mom. 

On this training, I am going to expose you to what you wished you were taught at school and most importantly by your mom and the women who raised you. 

Having said that, this is not a ride to ‘victimhood city’ or ‘let’s blame our moms for what they have done wrong boulevard’. As adult women, mothers ourselves, it is our responsibility to make our own choices and decisions, to rise up, educate ourselves and set boundaries that work for us. 

Self-care is your job, no one can do this for you.  

Are we on the same page? Say ‘yes’ out loud! 

Awesome! 

Let’s dive in. 

As mothers, we love our children more than life itself, and as a result we can be tempted to fix, coax, coach, interfere, overgive, overprotect and overdeliver at times. Although we most likely all do that sometimes, I think what our kids really need is to see us being grounded, centered, true to ourselves, eating good food, moving our bodies and living life to the fullest while standing by their side holding and mirroring their ‘suffering’, struggles and challenges with a trusting ‘knowing’ that they will be ok on the other side. 

Our children are safe. 
Our children are capable. 
Our children are lovable. 
Our children are worthy & complete. 
Our children are good. 

Here’s the deal though, you cannot give your children what you yourself don’t yet have. So if all of the things I just mentioned trigger you, we should start with you. 

When I say trigger, I mean, you cringe when I said those things. Or deep down inside you don’t really believe these things are true. Or maybe you have a bit of anger or an emotional charge towards your child that prevents you from believing these statements are true. 

Or maybe you feel like you are too busy, too tired, too exhausted and depleted from being overworked, unappreciated, undernourished, unmotivated, etc.  

Whatever the case may be for you, I want you to know that you are not alone, however, healing our relationship with our kids must start with taking a step back and healing our relationship with ourselves. 

Like Albert Einstain said, ‘you can’t fix a problem with the same mind that created it’. 

This is why my mantra is: “choose yourself first, always!’

Choosing yourself, or putting yourself first, might feel like a luxurious and even impossible in the time being, which is why this training is so important because it will teach you how to organize your life and live it more sustainably, effectively and productively along with your family. 

Let this training be the first step for you. 
Health Begins With You Mama!  

What are we going to cover in this training? 

In this audio training, you will learn to eat in a way that nourishes and supports your female body, your menstrual cycle and what makes you divinely uniquely you.

As a woman, 

  • You are not a little man. 
  • You are not a lovelier version of a man. 
  • You are not a less hairy man. 

You see, differences matter. 

It turns out that gender differences are more than reproductive differences. 

We are different. 

Studies show that when it comes to health, women and men heal differently, restore differently and function very differently. 

By the way, I have included all the references I used in this audio training at the bottom of the page, so feel free to check them out and do let me know if you’ve found something that I have overlooked. I am only human and mistakes happen. Also, the health industry changes all the time and something that could have been relevant a year ago would be obsolete today, so keep that in mind. 

For the time being, you can assume that everything I am going to be sharing with you today is valid and accurate. 

Let’s walk through a few examples of how these differences are manifested in our health : 

  1. Heart disease & stroke – did you know that Heart disease is the leading cause of death for women in the United States? Although heart disease is also the leading cause of death for men in the United States, women are more likely to die following a heart attack than men are.  
  2. Mental health – Women are more likely to show signs of depression and anxiety than men are. Depression is more common among women than men, likely due to certain biological, hormonal, and social factors that are unique to women. Women make less serotonin than men making them more susceptible to depression and mood swings. 
  3. Osteoporosis – Osteoarthritis is the most common form of arthritis. It causes joint pain, stiffness, and swelling. Arthritis is the leading cause of physical disability in the United States. The condition affects millions of people in the United States and seems to affect more women than men.7
  4. Stress – According to a recent survey by the American Psychological Association, stress is on the rise for women. According to a survey by the American Psychological Association (APA), stress is on the rise for women. For example, almost 50% of all women in the APA survey reported that their stress had increased over the past 5 years, compared to 39% of the men.9
  5. Alcohol abuse – even though men are more prone to getting addicted to alcohol, the health effects of alcohol abuse and alcoholism are more serious in women.  These health effects include an increased risk for breast cancer, heart disease, and fetal alcohol syndrome, in which infants born to mothers who drank during pregnancy suffer brain damage and learning difficulties.

When it comes to weight loss, digestion and metabolization of food women are different as well. 

  • Women metabolize food differently and lose weight, not like men. Men actually lose weight faster than women. 
  • Women taste food differently. 

Have you ever tried to follow an eating style or eating regiment only to drop it or “fail” at it a few months in? 

How often do you promise yourself that you will lose the weight, stop binging, start eating healthy, cook more at home, and do a meal plan? 

If you’re like me, I’m guessing every Monday and Thursday? 

Yup, I get it. 

Through the work, I do with women and my own research and experience I found the underlying reason for this. Are you ready for this? Brace yourself because this is quite controversial. 

Health and nutrition information, including clinical studies and research, is based mostly on males boodies. 

What do I mean by that? 

The health books you read are based on research and studies done on males (and are also written by men). Why? Because the national dietary standards were originally based on the studies of young healthy MALES?

In 1977 the FDA banned women from participating in clinical research and as a result, women’s health science was compromised. 

Have you been trying to follow a program or an eating style designed for men and see that men are successful with it but women only get heavier and angrier? 

The reason for this might be that you have been eating like a man but gaining weight like a woman. 

Before I get any further, I want to make something clear so you don’t get me wrong. 

My intention is not to make you feel bad about men or blame men for our own lack of knowledge of understanding or for the lack of proper scientific research. 

My intention is to help you understand that as women we are built, wired and designed differently and that in order to heal and take care of ourselves we need to have that in mind. 

As a woman, your health stands on three pillars – Nervous system, Digestive System and Hormonal System. 

References: 

  1. Woman Code by Alisa Vitti 
  2. What health issues or conditions affect women differently than men? 
  3. Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality. (2010). Cardiovascular disease and other chronic conditions in women: Recent findings. Retrieved August 3, 2012, from http://www.ahrq.gov/research/findings/factsheets/women/womheart/index.html
  4. World Health Organization. (n.d.). Gender and women’s mental health. Retrieved August 3, 2012, from http://www.who.int/mental_health/prevention/genderwomen/en/
  5. National Institute of Mental Health. (2012). Women and Depression: Discovering Hope. Retrieved August 22, 2012, from http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/women-and-depression-discovering-hope/complete-index.shtml
  6. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2017). Arthritis-related statistics. Retrieved May 16, 2018, from http://www.cdc.gov/arthritis/data_statistics/arthritis_related_stats.htm

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